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I JUST SPENT LIKE AN 1 HOUR OF MY LIFE ON THIS, GENIUS
this is legit so sick.
i hate it when you want to show a friend something you think is funny and you’re crying and on the floor from laughing and they just sit there
Is there a type of asexuality where you experience sexual attraction but the idea of being in a romantic relationship repulses you? Because if there is, I TOTALLY HAVE THAT.
this is me omg.
An x-ray showing a Buzz Lightyear action figure lodged in the anal cavity. The patient explained that it got stuck when it was inserted and a button was accidentally pushed, extending out the wings.
to infinity and beyond…
I’ve got a friend in me….
me: *blink*
parents: OH MY GOD YOU NEED AN EXTREME ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT I'M THE PARENT YOU'RE THE CHILD THAT'S HOW THIS WORKS I DONT KNOW WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE BUT YOU ARE COMPLETELY OUT OF CONTROL DO YOU LIKE HAVING NICE THINGS DO YOU LIKE HAVING A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD THEN START APPRECIATING IT AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM WASH THE WINDOWS LICK THE DIRT OFF THE KITCHEN FLOOR DO I LOOK LIKE YOUR MAID NO
